Derek

Derek "Cuddlebuns" Yi is one of the most elusive, ingenius, and powerful warlocks ever known. Derek has had, has, and does have a reputation for being a magical warlock, genius hacker, and uncomparable idiot. He is in possesion of one of the most deadliest hacking devices ever, known has hax.exe. Hax.exe can hack into anything. From bananas, to hassipos, to computers, you name it! ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)!

First Years
Derek hails from a land known as Gaypan ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). His father and father sent him here in a cryogenic pod to escape the tyranny of the Gaypanian dictator Dickphonso. The pod sailed through the atmosphere before ejecting Derek toward Delta, BC and then exploding over Russia. This is what we know as the Tunguska Event. He developed a taste for IHOP, and decided to live there

Warlock Abilities
With the help of a powerful program called Hax.exe, he can hack into any mainframe, software, security service, military, bananas, men, women, animals, Gaypanians, galaxys, etc. We have yet to find out how he obtained Hax.Exe in the first place, but the leading theory is that he spent 100 years dressed as a girl, in a forest with 100 pomegranates. After attracting a unicorn, he killed it an gathered its blood in a cup. He traded the cup for a boat to South America, where he dug up every beach there until he found a diamond. He then gave the diamond to the shady guy in the corner for 20% off his purchase of Hax.Exe. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)